"I think it's getting to the point where I can be myself again..."

So after my last post, I thought "maybe I should stop taking freelancing gigs and just let that last connection to NY go" (remember that I was trying that whole "filling a void, by creating more void." So how interesting is it that the next day, the universe throws me a bone. A little bone, but a bone. I wouldn't call it structure, but at least something new towards which I can direct some of my energy.

I got a gig as a back-up singer for a band. I was driving into Hamden to meet them...and as I turned onto this tiny backroad, I started to get scared that they were psychos that used ads for back-up singers as a way to lure poor, unsuspecting souls to their lair and do all sorts of unspeakable things to them. Then I pulled into the driveway of this happily lit house with kids' toys in the garage and a manicured front lawn, and decided it might be ok to go inside.

And really they're just nice people who want to play their instruments and sing their songs. They're from all walks of life. One of them is a ghost chaser....literally. She goes to cemeteries and other haunted places and takes pictures for analysis. Honestly, I think that's awesome. Especially since I swear I had a ghost in a hotel room I once had in Chicago...and also my friend Mike lives with one. Seriously. I won't get into it now, but there's a ton of evidence that he can't explain...and he's a scientist.

Now, I'd be too freaked out to run around cemeteries snapping random photos of nothing, but to meet someone who does it so unapologetically is actually pretty refreshing. It's just her thing. And hey, she could do worse.

Anyway, they haven't really had any gigs yet, but at this point, I'm not sure I mind singing in garages with some nice, talented people. Hopefully once there's a solid repertoire, we can take the show on the road. And if not, no harm done. I don't need people to listen to me sing, I just need a place to do it.

The best part about it right now...is that I get to be part of a "we". The second I got there, they gave me a mic. So three minutes after I walked in, I was singing. And after a few songs, they asked me what kind of music I like to sing...and told me I should feel free to bring them music because they'd learn whatever I wanted. To this I said "Does that mean you're keeping me?" "Definitely. You're our favorite."

It was fun, and they're really easy-going and nice. They're just happy to do music. Which is exactly what I need right now. No pressure, just musical expression.

Off to bed...my brother and I are waking up at 6:30 to watch the demolition of the New Haven Coliseum tomorrow. It's going to be nuts.