"We've paid our dues, but we can't make life pay..."

It's over. 28 is over. At 12:02am, I watched the numbers on the clock change and breathed a sigh of relief. Happy Birthday, dear. It's over.

What a trying year. But I guess it was not without its benefits and lessons.

A very wonderful person once read me the following passage:
"Adversity is like a strong wind. I don't mean just that it holds us back from places we might otherwise go. It also tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that afterwards we see ourselves as we really are, and not merely as we might like to be." (from "Memoirs of a Geisha")

Maybe life uses adversity as a way of course correcting. And maybe that was 28.

So many of us build up our lives...we put on our armor, our personas...we spend time, money and energy creating ourselves...and one day something happens that makes us realize that none of it fits. It all starts to unravel...and we realize that it all has to go.

And it hurts. The tearing away of the life we thought we had, of the life we thought we wanted, of the life we worked so hard for....

We mourn the days when we walked in ignorance, when things chugged along and they were just fine. But they're over. And we have no choice but to let them go.

And as we're shedding it all, we try so desperately to put ourselves back together. But it only happens when there's nothing left. When we can't possibly make the same mistakes twice because we have nothing to work with. It only happens when the slate is blank once again. And then it starts...slowly, to rebuild.

We might make new mistakes...but we've learned from our old ones. And we might have some scars...but it's only because we've healed.

It's difficult when your life is cracked open and you're forced to look inside...but it's worth it.

Now onto 29.

"Hello City..."

I re-read this and decided I didn't like the post. It was trying too hard to be clever prose, so I'm taking it off.

I will, however, leave my plug for Angie B's post as well as the story of her getting dragged through the icy puddle. :)

For example, just the other day, my friend Angie B. (check out the link to her blog) got dragged through a deep, icy puddle while trying to help an elderly lady across the street. She was trying to help this woman *avoid* the puddle...and instead the woman dragged her into it insisting that this was the way to go.

"It's been one week..."

It's been a week. I got distracted...and then I went away...and then I got insanely ill. I mean ill. It was awful. I haven't experienced that kind of pain in gosh-knows-how-long.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. I'll explain everything one thing at a time.

First, I got distracted. An opportunity arose--I don't want to go into it too much because I don't want to jinx it. And right now, it's a big bundle of potential with very little action. There are supposed to be conversations happening...they haven't. So I'm just waiting to see how things pan out. It could mean a lot of things...which is how I got distracted.

Second, I went away. I went to Maine on Friday to see one of my dearest friends. We've known each other since high school and she's one of my favorite people in the world. She lives with her hubby and two kids (who are my favorite children in the world) in South Portland and I haven't been up there to visit yet.

It was a great weekend. Mostly it was so great to see my friend so happy. She and her husband have such a great relationship, and she's a tremendous mommy, too. Their kids are little darlings, brilliant and expressive. I really was just happy being in the middle of it all...and watching what it takes to be a family.

It made me appreciate the whole idea of really knowing who you are and what you need before committing to a marriage. It's an incredible commitment that takes a lot of patience and negotiation and a rock solid foundation of love and trust. And they have that...and I haven't seen that very often.

It bothers me when people (men and women alike) feel that getting married will end their fill-in-the-blank-here....loneliness, depression, insecurity, need to be loved, etc, etc, etc. That's a lot of pressure to put on a relationship. It's a lot to ask of someone else...to solve something so deep inside of oneself. And usually it's something only the individual can solve...

But when the foundation is right, I totally saw how having a family could be totally doable. And could be really fulfilling. I'm not sure that I had that perspective before...I thought I did...but really I think I was scared by the prospect of it all.

That's the biggest thing I got out of my time in Maine. The other thing I got was the norovirus...otherwise known as the "Norwalk virus". It sounds so cute and friendly, right? WRONG. It's nasty. It's a mean little shit that tears your insides up and makes you want to surgically remove your stomach so you will never have to deal with that kind of pain again. It gives you a headache and a fever, it makes you vomit and the pain makes you delirious. Talking made me want to throw up. Seriously.

I was able to drink one ounce of Pedialyte all day on Sunday. By Sunday night, I was able to hold down about another 3 ounces of Welch's White Grape Juice (this is now my favorite juice in the whole world).

My fever broke at 3:30am on Monday morning, but the appetite didn't return until 12 hours later (when I had some saltines). I could, however, keep down Gatorade and Ginger Ale...so I loaded up on those at 7-11 and started the 4-hour drive back home. Luckily, with no traffic and short stops (since I wasn't hungry), I made it in 3.5. Then I took a nap. And last night, I slept eleven and a half hours.

I'm still only able to eat plain food, and I'm still exhausted, but it's on its way out. Finally.

So that's it. That's my long-winded explanation as to why it took me a whole week to post something new. I'm going to eat more saltines now...

"Branded like a racing car..."

Superbowl weekend has come and gone. I had plans to go to a family friend's house for the game, but there was an emergency in the family so the festivities were called off. Instead, I had a full day, cooked some food and curled up with a good book (Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides, 529 pages, no pictures).

I TiVo'd the game and had a nice little evening with my food and my book. Then a few hours into it, I started fast-forwarding the game and watching the advertising. You think I'm joking...

I'm just not a football fan. For me, it's just a bunch of guys hitting each other and running around. I understand what's going on during the game, I just don't care about it. So since I wasn't at a party socializing, I figured why sit around and watch it when I've got a good book and TiVo? :)

And really, I only watch the Superbowl for the ads... which, as a whole, I thought were so-so. I generally find this to be the case since there's so much hype about them.

BUT some were fantastic and had me laughing out loud to myself. So I thought I'd post some of my winners and losers of the evening...since it's the only reason I bothered to tune into CBS last night. :)

WINNERS (in no particular order):
Careerbuilder.com--This new campaign is hilarious! It's also an excellent way to evolve the brand from the monkey campaign. They've kept the quirky, silly, we-know-how-you-feel approach, and married it to a new insight. Brilliant.




Coca-Cola--I loved all three of their spots. I love the Disneyland approach where it's a bit outlandish, but it still puts a smile on your face. Also I like the whole "experience the Coke side of life" concept.




Bud Light--A note on Bud Light Superbowl advertising: because they've always had a huge Superbowl presence, I tend to regard these ads more as entertainment...not that they're not strategic at all, but you can tell that BL is very conscious that these are the Superbowl ads. That being said, I LOVED the "Slapping". It's *stoopid* humor...I mean basic, dumb humor. But man, it's funny. :) I also loved "What would Carlos do?" and "Hitchhiker."










Emerald Nuts-- Just the thought of Robert Goulet coming into your office in the afternoon and messing with your stuff is hysterical.





Oprah and Letterman--I don't have to say anything about this, except "Brilliant!"




King Pharmaceuticals--I worked in pharma advertising on a brand where we had to figure out how to spell out cardiac risk for people in a way that was compelling but not scary..and this nailed it. It could've gotten dark...but they kept the music silly and light, and that was what made it work.




Taco Bell--This one appealed to my silliness. Two lions talking about how to say "Carne asada" in a sexy way...like Ricardo Montalban.



LOSERS:
The Really Patronizing Black History Month Tribute--I don't even want to talk about this one. It just made me mad.

Fed Ex--After their hilarious "10 parts of a Superbowl ad" in 2005, they haven't managed to get it right again. What's with the random killing of people in their campaigns? Last year an elephant stepped on a caveman...and this year a meteor kills a guy floating in space. Random....and stupid, in my opinion.

Speaking of cavemen....why would GEICO spend $2.6 million to run the *same* ad they've been running for a while?

Budweiser--Crabs worshipping a cooler? Whatever.

Toyota Tundra--I get the whole "actual demonstration"concept...but I missed something in these. Maybe I'm just not the target, so it's just not speaking to me...but they seemed kind of bland. It seemed like they *thought* they were doing something impressive and cutting edge...but really it was boring.

Nationwide--I LOVED the way they used Kevin Federline in this (and I love that he was such a good sport)...it was a great insight, too (life changes can be sudden and dramatic). BUT did anyone remember that this ad was for Nationwide? Nope. They just knew it featured K-Fed. If people can't remember your brand/company, what's the point of spending $2.6 million?


So that's my run down. Feel free to agree or disagree with me, and let me know if I missed any gems. But those were the ones that came to mind :)

NB: I'd also like to note that I missed the first 30 minutes of the game, so I haven't seen *all* the ads. The Blockbuster ad came to my attention today (the one with the rabbit and the guinea pig) and I also LOVED it.

"Her life [on meds], in a nutshell..."

Being on drugs all the time has been interesting (no worries, it's *nothing* serious at all...just a minor problem that won't go away).

Your body gets screwy on antibiotics and you can't anticipate what you'll feel like on any given day. Some days I'm exhausted...other days I can't sleep.

Sometimes I'm hungry, sometimes I just can't seem to get myself to eat anything. (Last night, that was not the case...I made a banana cake and served it with fresh banana slices and homemade whipped cream. The night before I made Swedish meatballs. I marinated and baked chicken wings, too. Hmmmm....went a little nuts when the appetite reappeared, didn't I?)

And then the headaches come and go which drives me craaaazy.

Mostly, it's frustrating when all I can do is observe myself. But at the same time, it's interesting to note how my body has decided to deal with the influx of meds.

For example, I now know that when I take any sort of penicillin-type drug, I get those horrible (or should I say wonderful?) pudding cravings. Those have subsided now that I'm on a different antibiotic. NOW, all I want is protein (hence the Swedish meatballs and the chicken, I guess. I'm not quite sure how the banana cake fits in there, but it's pretty good).

On the days where I'm exhausted my ability to sleep amazes me. And my exhaustion annoys me....it just makes it hard to plan ahead.

T-minus 2 days before I'm done with the meds. Then I go to the doc to make sure I'm all better. But we'll see. In the past 60 days, I've spent 24 of them taking some type of antibiotic. At some point, I'd like to get back on track...and I'd LOVE for my body to cooperate with me.

I was hoping that I could muster a more amusing post...but tonight I'm pretty pooped.